At 45, my AMH was down to 0.6. Two embryo transfers in my home country had failed, and my doctor’s tone made it clear he was gently pushing me toward the door. So I looked overseas, and eventually landed on Colombia. This post isn’t selling a dream. I’m just laying out the data I gathered over six months and the traps I stepped into, number by number, so you can do your own math before spending a cent.
Egg Retrieval at 45: 9 Eggs, 2 Blastocysts
Let’s start with the most painful numbers. At my clinic in Bogotá, my first stimulation cycle retrieved 9 eggs. 7 fertilized. Only 2 made it to blastocyst, and both were mosaic-heavy. Honestly? The clinic never hid anything from me: they quoted about a 5% success rate per cycle for own-egg IVF at 45, right up front.
I went through two cycles and spent roughly $48,000. One blastocyst failed to implant; the other ended in a biochemical pregnancy. If you’re around 45, my advice is simple: get an antral follicle count and AMH first. If your AMH is under 0.8 and you still insist on using your own eggs, budget for at least 3 cycles. Otherwise, seriously consider donor eggs. Don’t fight a war of attrition against your own time and money.
How I Verified a Colombian Clinic’s Lab Numbers
When screening clinics, I ignored the glossy website pages and asked for three things directly: the past year’s live birth rates broken down by age group, blastocyst formation rates, and the certification number of the embryology lab from an independent accreditation body.
One clinic advertised a 60% success rate. When I pulled the thread, that figure blended own-egg cycles for women under 35 with all donor-egg cycles. The actual number for the 45-plus group was single digits. I later learned this is common: many centers prop up their overall stats with donor cycles. Here’s your one and only filter: demand data for your specific age group and your specific protocol (own eggs vs. donor eggs). If they can’t produce it, move to the next clinic. No exceptions.
The Legal Gatekeepers of Surrogacy in Colombia — and the Options I Ruled Out
Once the own-egg route was clearly a dead end, I started researching surrogacy in Colombia. It’s one of the few countries open to single women and same-sex couples, and court precedent supports intended parents being registered as the child’s legal parents. But there are two hard requirements: the surrogate must come from an economically disadvantaged background, participate voluntarily, and have her own independent legal counsel; and at least one intended parent must have a genetic link — meaning the process must use your or your partner’s sperm.
A country I initially considered on price? As a single woman, I had no legal path there at all. Immediately eliminated. Here’s a checklist you can use right now: confirm your marital/single status can be legally registered in that country; confirm parentage precedent exists; confirm the surrogate’s lawyer and the intended parents’ lawyer are two separate, independent parties. If any of these fail, walk away.
The Surrogacy Process, Step by Step — How Many Days It Actually Took
From signing the contract to my child’s birth: 11 months. Here’s the breakdown: 1 month to match with a surrogate, 3 weeks for psychological and background screening, 5 weeks for contract drafting and notarization, about 2 months for the surrogate’s preparation cycle up to embryo transfer, then 10 months of pregnancy.
The step people most often try to compress — and regret — is the contract. Four clauses must be in writing, black on white: payment installments, liability for pregnancy risks, the surrogate’s lifestyle rules during pregnancy (smoking and drinking clauses), and the handover arrangements after birth. I watched a couple skip the surrogate’s independent lawyer review to save time, and then get stuck for two extra weeks on visas and the baby’s documents. Don’t scrimp on those 5 weeks. What you’re saving is trouble, and it compounds.
Doing IVF at 45 isn’t really a test of courage — it’s a test of how fast you can cut your losses. My advice: spend two weeks verifying real success-rate data for your age group before deciding between own eggs and donor eggs. If you go the Colombia surrogacy route, pour your time into the contract and the screening, and skip nothing. Judge early, land early, and your child’s birth certificate won’t keep getting pushed back.